Lessons: February 2008 Archives

How many times have you heard a single friend say, "if only I had a boyfriend/ girlfriend/ soul mate my life would be perfect." I've always thought that logic was flawed. That's way to much pressure to put on a potential partner. If you expect a "soul mate" to come along and make your life perfect, in reality the only thing you'll achieve is to frighten him or her off.

It makes far more sense to put your own life in order, and make it as perfect as you possibly can before you search for a special someone to enjoy your life with. That way you're more likely to attract someone who sees you for the fulfilled and healthy individual that you are. After all, do you really want to be with someone who's attracted to your neediness? Furthermore, if a "soul mate" fails to come along, with your house in order you're in a better position to enjoy the life you have. It's a win-win strategy.

So when the Daily Mantra's like-minded MySpace buddy Dvorahji, a fun-loving guru from the school of common sense, posted her Ask Dvorahji: Where Is My Soul Mate video on our page, I had to both laugh and marvel her infallible, down-to-earth wisdom. In the YouTube clip (if player fails to load click HERE to view), the eccentric (in the best possible way), self-styled "final guide for the spiritually challenged and confused" reads out a letter from an 84-year old woman called Sarah who wants to know where her soul mate is.

"The problem is everyone is spending so much time looking for a soul mate that they are absolutely not enjoying their life," Dvorahji responds. "Why waste a another moment looking for a soul mate." Dvorahji certainly didn't. Life's way too short. She went out and bought a soul mate for $250 from a puppy pound in a Wal-Mart parking lot. Who ever said soul mate's only come with two legs?

This wonderful short called Carried Away (if player fails to load, click HERE to view), by animator Zach Parrish, reminded my of a recent trip to the Point Dume, CA. After a heady walk along the breathtaking State Beach there, I returned to my car as the sun was setting and saw two very elegant older ladies reclining on deck chairs merrily blowing bubbles with very young hearts.

Next time life is getting you down try some bubble therapy for yourself. A website that amusingly offers "homemade bubble solutions" suggests using 1 part liquid dish washing detergent to 12 parts water. For those who are more serious about their bubbles, a few drops of glycerin or a dash of corn syrup is also recommended to increase size, elasticity, and durability. And, according to a bubble expert at Flora's Hideout, "Don't throw any leftovers away either. The longer your solution sits, the better it gets."

Check out this animated short about evil in western civilization from Ancient Greece to the present day (if player fails to load click HERE to view). The filmmaker, who is known only as YouTube user Omaggs2000, explains it was, "intended to show what people have believed in and pointed to as evil throughout history. It was meant to get you to think about what evil really is. It is meant to show that when we get too obsessed with 'evil' we might end up taking part in it ourselves."

"One has to separate evil and human cruelty," explains Omaggs2000. "Human cruelty is people not being nice to one another. Evil is something else, it is something we have created, a word and a concept for things that are not acceptable. It is a label for things that we do not understand and don't want to understand. But is evil really ever a complete explanation for anything? A lot of bad deeds has been done in the name of good. The people that did them meant good, are they evil?"

Finally, Omaggs2000 wants you to know that the video is not meant to

• A: Blame religion for all the evil in the world.
  
• B: Claim that God is dead. (It is simply a reference to the philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche, look him up.)
  
• C: Offend anyone, race, religion, gender or sexual orientation.
  
• D: Claim that Elvis was evil.
  
• E: Be an exact and complete account of the actual events that has taken place throughout history.

What is Love? Ah, that universal question, which has haunted philosophers through the ages. On February 14 we celebrate Valentines Day and honor the loved ones in our lives. But Love is so much more than paper Valentines cards, a box of chocolates or naughty lingerie. Love is the deep, deep bond that holds our little planet together, and there is no time more important to think about Love than right now.

Existentialist Rollo May once said, "Hate is not the opposite of love; apathy is." We can see all around us the evidence of the power of love to move us to do things for other people. We sacrifice ourselves for our loved ones and work to overcome all kinds of obstacles for the sake of love. This power is not only true for romantic relationships, but for other kinds of love too. The ancient Greeks said that there were four different kinds of love: Agape, a pure and selfless love, Eros, a sensual love of beauty, Philia, a brotherly and virtuous love, and Storge, the love between a parent and child.

When we broaden our understanding of love, we can see our behaviors as being motivated by the different kinds of love in our lives. We compost, because we love mother earth with the soulful love of Agape. We work to end homelessness, out of a deep feeling of Philia for our fellow human beings. We strive for healthy relationships within our families, building up from the basic foundation of love laid down by Storge. We increase the beauty in the world around us by creating beautiful pieces of artwork and sensuously honoring the physical, sexual love of Eros in our lives.

Apathy traps us in miserable, loveless lives and robs us of our power to change situations for the better. Apathy causes people to stay home on voting day, to throw away useful things that could be reused or recycled, to plop kids in front of a video instead of playing with them, and to walk right on past a fellow human being in need.

John Lennon had it right when he said, "All we need is love." We need the big, universal love and the focused, interpersonal love, and all the different kinds of love in between, to get us through the changes on humanity's horizon. Perhaps the most important kind of love is self-love, because when we love ourselves and we understand that the whole world is interconnected as one, we can see that sending love out into the world is the same as loving ourselves. So this Valentines Day, send a paper heart to yourself and initiate some magical, positive changes in the world through the power of love.

Procrastination is the Rodney Dangerfield of human experience. It's something you'll never get respect for, it's under-appreciated and underrated. If you tune into your need to procrastinate however, you may just find it serves a purpose. It may just be your mind's way of telling you it's not quite ready to do the task at hand.

Next time you get the urge to procrastinate, don't fight it, but work with it. Surrender to your need and go do something else, but do something rather than nothing. We're not extolling the virtues of being a couch potato, but sometimes your mind does need the freedom to wonder.

Try performing some mindless task, such as doing the dishes or cleaning the bathroom, while giving your unconscious mind the brain-break it needs to do its thing. You may start on your intended task two hours, or even two days later, but you'll do it better and more efficiently, and you'll have a clean toilet to boot!

Need procrastination inspiration? Try hitting these appropriately mindless (in the best sense of the word) sites:

• Procrastinate with eco-friendly, virtual bubble wrap.
  http://fun.from.hell.pl/2003-11-24/bubblewrap.swf
  
  
  
• Make music with sheep rather than counting them.
  http://eecs.harvard.edu/~nesson/sequencer.html
  
  
  
• A silly story with apples and aliens.
  http://souljerky.com/_media/swf/alan_watts_appling.swf
  
  
  
• Projects with tennis balls and tissues.
  http://lifehackery.com/2008/01/23/99-extraordinary-uses-for-ordinary-objects/
  
  
  
• A (not-so) physical feat to try at home or in the office.
  http://www.sciencemadesimple.co.uk/page73g.html
  
  
  
• If you're looking for a little perspective.
  http://slashninja.com/it-depends-how-you-look-at-it/
  
  
  
• Try procrastinating to stop hunger.
  http://www.freerice.com/
  
  
  
• Become our friend online.
  http://www.myspace.com/thedailymantra
  http://www.facebook.com/people/Daily_Mantra/539823722
  
  
  
• Know your dreams can become a reality
  http://www.slipperybrick.com/2008/01/star-trek-gadgets/
  
  
  
• A moral to bear in mind before you take action.
  http://freshgasflow.com/ourcrazyplanet/transport/crazy_cranes.htm